In the five years since I first launched this blog — and in the 1.5 years since I began coaching — I’ve learned a thing or two about the things that can hold a freelancer back.

And aside from the lure of a smooshy couch, a good book, or a curated list of sparkly jewelry on Etsy, a lot of the roadblocks we put up around ourselves stem from the pitch process.

You’ve asked me so many questions about query letters over the years:

How do I find publications to pitch?

Which editor should I target?

What do I do if I have no clips/experience/personal connection?

How long should I wait before I follow up?

Is my letter really good enough to send out? 

I had the same questions when I started out and, over the years, I developed my own system for making the pitch to publish process go smoother.

So what’s my trick to busting query fear?

For the past few months,  I’ve been working on 5 Weeks to Freelance Awesome: An Action Plan, a workbook that takes you from idea generation to the building of your freelance brand. This workbook, which will be available for sale in the late spring, will be pretty damn fantastic. But as I worked on it, I couldn’t help but ask myself: Is there a way I can use this information to show gratitude to my loyal word nerd readers? Is there a way I can share this information with readers without ruining the big reveal?

Yesterday, I emailed Word Nerd News subscribers with a download link to Freelance Awesome: A Starter Kit, a FREE mini-workbook containing the five worksheets necessary to jumpstart your freelance writing career. These worksheets comprise the system I’ve put in place for making my own pitch process a helluva lot easier. I use them on an almost-daily basis. They help me:

• generate story ideas
• conduct market research
• write kick-ass query letters, and
• track pitches and assignments

These worksheets take the self-doubt out of story pitching, and help me keep the freelance momentum going.

Because I don’t want you to miss out, I encourage you to sign up for my mailing list as well. As a subscriber to Word Nerd News, you’ll receive instant access to my starter kit. Not only that, but you’ll receive a once-a-month email containing freelance success stories, solid advice, and valuable resources from around the web. I’d say it’s a win-win.

Once you’ve downloaded my .pdf-powered word glitter, I only ask one thing in return: If you find my starter kit helpful… if you think I have something valuable to offer… if you think my hair is pretty… if you think I could be a service to someone else you know, tell them to sign up for my mailing list, too.

(If you don’t want to sign up right now, you can always come back later. There’s a simple sign-up form in the right-hand sidebar of this blog, and a sign-up button on my professional site as well.)

I should also tell you that, next week (Thursday, February 9 at 12 p.m. PST / 3 p.m. EST), I’ll be appearing on Carol Tice‘s weekly podcast, over at the Freelance Writer’s Den, to talk freelance startup plans. (You may recall that Carol is one of my favorite freelance writing bloggers.) This is a members-only event, so be sure to register beforehand!

Finally, I want to give a big thanks to Lyz Lenz, my writing partner, for ripping my workbook to shreds and then helping me put it back together again; Melanie Ostmo, a fantastic designer, for making my starter kit all sorts of pretty; and Milena Canizares, a former coaching client who was kind enough to read through my kit and give me her feedback before I shared it with the world.

Go forth and rock it, y’all.

Related: How To Pitch: The Basics

I just finished several large projects; I deserve a break.

I’m distracted because I’m waiting on responses to my lit agent queries; can you blame me?

I’m suffering from Holiday Brain.

I’m suffering from S.A.D.

I’m suffering from this god-awful, nasty, lingering cold.

Poor excuses all, especially considering how much work I could’ve been doing based upon the goals I’d set out for myself.

I’ve been procrastinating on one project in particular: pulling together the notes for the ASJA panel I’m appearing on in the spring. (For more information, you can now find the lowdown on my Sex Writing panel here, on the tab for Saturday, April 28.)

Of course, when it comes to issues of procrastination, burnout, and rebooting, there’s a lot of advice out there: Step away from your work. Schedule in a walk, workout, or meal. Do something that nourishes your soul. Meditate. Etc.

But don’t these tips assume we’re all struggling for one, universal reason? Aren’t they all just temporary salves that don’t actually solve the underlying problem? Why else would we need to repeat them again and again (and again)?

Shouldn’t we be tackling the root of the problem?

Earlier this week, I started reading Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way (I know; I’m just 20 thousand years behind every other writer in the world), and began doing morning pages. On my very first morning, I found myself writing about the ASJA task I mentioned above, and about my true reasons for procrastinating. Somewhat miraculously, I was able to tease out the actual fears that were lurking behind my first reason for procrastinating: It’s far off, so I don’t yet feel any great sense of urgency.

One of those fears was in regard to my general horror in regard to public speaking. Will I be completely awkward? Will I be boring? Will I have a panic attack and lose consciousness? 

But the greater fear was revealed to be about my own feelings of inferiority. Am I too small-time for the well-established writers who will be attending ASJA? Will attendees be disappointed? I don’t make all my money as a writer! I’ve only written for two national magazines! I’m the only one on this panel without a published book! Am I good enough for this?

Once I had targeted these fears, I started flipping them around, transforming them into affirmations:

I have accomplished so much as a writer.

This is a sex writing panel. I have been writing about sex for 10 years, in a variety of media. I have a lot of valuable information to share.

I have been successful in the ways I’ve been hoping for. I am making enough money for me.

I have co-authored an ebook with a well-known sex counselor, and receive royalties. This accomplishment should bring me just as much validitation as the other panelists’ books.

I have something unique to offer.

After concluding my morning pages, I made my way to my computer and opened up the blank document that was to contain all my notes for the ASJA panel. I spent the next five hours drawing up a preliminary script for my presentation, putting together an outline for all the information I wanted to include, and contacting past editors for publication-specific advice I could share with panel attendees.

I got into the zone and, when I was done, I felt good. Relieved. Productive. Accomplished.

Scheduling in breaks and taking care of yourself are good tips when you’re suffering from burnout.

But what if you’re suffering from imposter syndrome? Or boredom with a project? Or lack of faith? What then?

Have you been procrastinating on a specific project lately? Try to pinpoint the true cause of your ambivalence. Then treat that cause… not the symptom.

Related: Didn’t Get It Done? That’s Your Own Damn Fault, Getting It Done, Want Freelance Success? Watch Your Health, How To Work from Home Without Losing Your Mind

Is it something in the air? Have our work cycles somehow become synced up? Are all of our regular clients just too damn busy stringing up twinkle lights and hanging stockings to bother with assigning out new work?

Part of it is the conclusion of another fiscal year. Large projects are ending. Annual budgets are drying up. Clients are holding back until 2012… fiddling with their editorial calendars… treading water until they feel safe spending money again.

Another part of it is Holiday Brain. Between all of those projects we just wrapped up, all of those pound cakes and soups we just made for Thanksgiving, and all of that holiday shopping we now have to do, we completely forgot about marketing ourselves. I mean, who has time to hustle when there are catnip candy canes and glittery tree ornaments to be bought!?

Unfortunately, considering how much money we tend to spend during the holiday season (buying a third ceramic Christmas tree was totally worth it), we need new income now more than ever.

So how can you make the holidays work for you?

Give one last end-of-the-year, holiday-themed marketing push:

• throw an industry holiday party, at which all attendees leave with a stocking full of business cards, coupons, and candy cane kisses.
• hold a workshop for writers, teach an e-course, or throw together a teleclass on targeting your pitches toward the (other) holidays.
• speaking of targeted pitches, start brainstorming… for the fourth of July.
• throw a holiday sale on your most popular products and/or services.
• hold a holiday contest… look to relevant companies and collaborators in order to put together a kick-ass list of prizes.
• gift your favorite clients with a holiday discount… or even with a small gift just to show you appreciate them. (Susan Johnston recently shared her own gift ideas here.)
• make like Santa and gift every blog in your particular universe with a guest post. Well. Assuming they want one.
• instead of a cookie swap or Secret Santa extravaganza, organize a product/service swap among those within your professional network. Watch new professional relationships bloom.
• volunteer your time (and promote yourself as an expert) by answering questions on sites like Brazen Careerist or LinkedIn, or responding to reporters’ queries on HARO.
• crash all the other holiday industry parties in your general area.
• go caroling with local freelancers, and end with hot cocoa and career-related brainstorming for the new year back at your place.
• [INSERT ANY OTHER FUN, SILLY, RIDICULOUS, HOLIDAY-RELATED THING YOU CAN THINK OF. GET CREATIVE, YO!]

Whew! Now I really want to go caroling.

ANYway.

I plan on doing a whole slew of these. But for the moment, I’d like to let you know about my own holiday sale, over at Career Coaching for Word Nerds. Most of you already know that I already offer three career coaching packages at various price points, for those who want to commit to either four sessions, 12 sessions, or 24 sessions of coaching.

From now until December 31, I will be offering One Hour to a Word Nerd Action Plan, a single, one-hour session in which we lay out your plans for the coming year, after which you’ll receive a packet containing all of the action steps we discussed, plus a list of relevant resources.

Note: This does not mean you must schedule your session in the midst of this crazy-as-hell holiday season. It just means you have to purchase this package by the 31st, after which it will wink out of existence, much like the twinkle lights all over your neighborhood. (Um. Unless you have the sort of neighbors who leave that shit up through April.)

Interesting in purchasing the gift that will keep on giving? Head on over to my coaching page and scroll to the bottom for this holiday package.

Then get your ass in gear and start marketing, word nerds!

How have you gotten creative with marketing during holidays past?

Related: How To Market the Crap Out of Yourself

Of course, I get my motivation and accountability elsewhere. My writing partner, Lyz Lenz, sends me threatening emails every week.

But what about the rest of you? Where can you go to ensure that your writing goals are met, thanks to a mix of motivation, camaraderie, and abject fear?

1. For those of you who have trouble updating your blog on a regular basis (shut up; I was doing very, very important things… okay, I was tweeting and surfing Etsy), there’s NaBloPoMo, or National Blog Posting Month (also in November). You can check out the BlogHer site for writing prompts and badges and then dive on in, secure in the knowledge that, at least for one month, you were on top of things.

2. If your November is just too damn busy (with Christmas shopping), there’s always Michelle Rafter’s WordCount Blogathon, in May. Check out Michelle’s Blogathon page for all the ways in which participating can help you build your biz.

3. And of course, those are just two of the more well-known ones. You can search for blog carnivals within your specific niche at this handy-dandy online directory.

4. If you’ve got your blogging covered, however, and would rather concentrate on content you can create for actual money, I highly recommend Freelance Success‘s twice-a-year Query Challenge. For the brief period of time in which I was a member of this professional writer’s group, I found the Challenge to be its most beneficial resource. Participants were split into teams and pitted against each other, earning points through queries and LOIs, and through the assignments that resulted from them. Team members had to report their points once a week, and team rankings were sent out in the weekly e-newsletter. There’s nothing like some healthy competition (and the fear of letting your teammates down) to make you sweat.

5. Then there are those sites and applications that target your writing productivity, and that can be used year-round. 750 Words is one such resource. It’s a site on which users aim to write at least 750 words a day and, for their troubles, receive points for their progress, and stats about what they’ve written (such as their most productive times of day, their quickest entries, their most common topics, and their most frequently used words).

6. Finally, if extreme terror is the most effective form of motivation for you, there’s always Write or Die. I’m afraid to use it, but rumor has it that, if you don’t reach your writing goals for the day, this application send you a threatening email, announces your failure to the entire Twitterverse, erases your hard drive, and makes your coffee pot malfunction.

Just kidding.

Write or Die tracks your writing and, if you pause for too long, you either a) receive a gentle reminder pop-up, telling you to stop being such a goddamn slacker (gentle mode), b) are subjected to an “unpleasant sound” that only ceases if you continue writing (normal mode), or c) are forced to watch your writing unwrite itself (kamikaze mode). Note: I am afraid to use this app.

7. Of course, you could always use mini goals, rewards, self-imposed deadlines, and good, old-fashioned self-discipline, but where’s the fun in that?

Any of you guys have an app or non-technical trick that keeps you at your keyboard?

Related: Didn’t Get It Done? That’s Your Own Damn Fault, Resource Roundup: 4 Time Management Applications, Are Professional Organizations Worth the Cost?, Motivational Trick: Fear (of Letting Others Down), Finding Someone to Drag You to the Finish Line

- my cats
- an opened bag of Candy Cane Kisses
- music that is particularly peppy
- the knowledge that there is an unwatched episode of The Sing-Off on my DVR
- the dust I just noticed on the far edge of my desk
- a sink full of dishes
- Etsy
- my sudden obsession with yoga bolsters, brightly colored jeans, or illusion necklaces
- Twitter
- etc.

This past weekend — at a time when I was supposed to be working on the first chapter of my book so that I could get it to my writing partner by Monday — we lost power (along with hundreds of thousands of others on the east coast, thanks to a freak October blizzard). Okay, fine, I thought to myself. I’ll give myself a pass. My laptop will die in under two hours anyway.

Then, on Sunday night, the power came back on.

By Monday morning, however, Internet had still not been restored. “Ooh!” I said to my husband. “I’ll take this opportunity to write that chapter without any distractions!”

I then proceeded to spend the next few hours watching Project Runway, playing Spider Solitaire, and checking email on my phone.

Here’s the thing: Even without the typical distractions, we will create them. Because sitting down and starting something is hard.

So don’t complain about all the distractions at home. Don’t say you couldn’t get your book done or your business started up because of this or that or oh my god my cat needs snuggles!

Sit your ass down and let it flow.

It won’t flow all at once. It won’t come easy. But if you work hard at clearing out the cobwebs and pushing past the crap, it will come eventually.

Need help? Here are some tips and resources I’ve blogged about in the past:

• Tricks for Self-Motivation
• 4 Time Management Applications
• Overcoming Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
• Writer’s Block, Ennui, and Other Barriers to Productivity
• How To Stay Motivated When Life Is Less Than Motivating

Also, here are some fantastic apps for eliminating the number one distraction in your life: the Internet.

What’s worked for you when it comes to sitting your butt in the chair and forging on, despite distractions?

Finishing that project (the last of the edits were completed in mid-August) was like coming up for air. It was freeing, but I also felt burnt out and unmotivated. I lost all momentum. For weeks, I did the bare minimum, telling myself I’d get back in the saddle after “that trip” or “that holiday weekend.” But I never did.

Then I started making yoga a bigger part of my life* and, suddenly, I was able to jump into new coaching work, start singing funerals again, and write a book proposal. Magic? Not quite.

Yesterday, I had a free wellness coaching session with Linda Formichelli. I had previously only known Linda as a freelance guru and writing coach, but I was intrigued when she announced the launch of HappyFit Coaching. To me, it made sense to see her expand her business to include health and wellness. Why? Because incorporating exercise and other positive health practices into your work day is about much more than achieving optimal work/life balance.

In chatting with Linda about my love affair with yoga, I admitted to her that, aside from making me feel stronger, more balanced, and more toned (you should check out my ass), yoga has also:

• helped me wake up in the morning, making the transition from sleep to work a lot less excruciating.
• given me a much-needed break in the middle of the day, allowing me to come back to the computer screen feeling refreshed and ready to kick some ass.
• stretched me out, which is great when you experience chronic back, neck, and shoulder pain from being hunched over your computer for the majority of your existence.
• quieted my mind, which is nice when you’re stressing the eff out over late-paying clients, scope creep, deadlines, and life in general.
• helped me get to sleep at night, which was previously impossible due to my inability to turn my brain off.

In short, being healthier made me a lot more productive.

Wouldn’t you like some of that?

Your own healthy habits don’t have to include yoga, but they should include activities that invigorate you, stretch you out, and give you an endorphin high. You should also eat nutritious meals (the pre-cooked chicken wings at the supermarket don’t count), so that you feel less horrifically sluggish, and you should make sleep a bigger priority. No more all-nighters, yo!

I’m not a health professional (which would be obvious if you ever secretly observed me), but I can point you toward some of the things that have inspired me to lead a healthier life. French Women Don’t Get Fat, for example, taught me a lot about mindful eating. And The Flex Diet – which isn’t actually a diet — provided me with lots of suggestions for eating healthier and enjoying my workouts.

And if you can’t afford a gym or studio membership, no worries. I rent belly dancing, hoop dancing, and yoga DVDs from Netflix all the damn time. Oh. And walking is free. (Don’t ask me to run, though. I don’t go above a power walk.)

Have you been giving your health short shrift? Do you think it may be negatively impacting your work? What one health-related change can you make to your day in order to boost productivity?

*Why yes, I AM obnoxiously obsessed with yoga lately. I”m sorry. You’re gong to have to deal with it. I’l try to mix up the yoga mentions with photos of my cats.

Related: How to Work from Home Without Losing Your Mind, Better Than Xanax

Which makes me feel relieved that I put a stop to that bullshit early on.

I mean man. What a waste.

Not to say that working in an office isn’t better for some. Office culture provides structure. A social outlet. A separation between work and home.

But still.

You can have that at home, too. In fact, you can have it even better.

How?

1. Create a space that’s all your own, and that’s all about work.

Depending upon your living arrangement, your home office may not be an actual home office. In fact, it may be a corner of the kitchen. It may be a closet. It may not even have a door. But it should be all about you and your work.

For the past year, I’ve worked in bed with my laptop. [Insert long, frustrating story involving us putting our clutter in storage, and putting our condo on the market.] Not only was this terrible for my back and my legs, but it was also terrible for my productivity, and terrible for my motivation levels. So we grabbed a smaller, hand-me-down, antique desk from my mom and moved it into our “office” space this past weekend.

I share the space with my husband. There are two litter boxes to the left of me. There’s no separation between this space and the living room. But I have a small amount of storage now. I have my ergonomic chair. I’m not working where I sleep.

And this has made all the difference in the world.

2. Set work hours.

Or, if you’re loath to fall in line with the corporate 9-to-5, at least schedule out blocks of time for each item on your daily to-do list.

Is your to-do list out of control? You can more effectively prioritize your time — and the items on your list — by setting quantifiable goals. First, ask yourself: Where do I want to be a year from now? Use the answers you come up with to draw up a list of goals for the coming year. Then ask yourself: Which items on my already-existing to-do list get me closer to these goals? Move these to the top of your list. Move the other items lower, or consider eliminating them entirely.

Next, break down your goals into more easily accomplished (and far less overwhelming) action steps. Schedule them out over the course of the year.

Finally, every morning, draw up a list of your goals for that day.

Start fresh every morning, so as to avoid feelings of guilt and frustration.

And if you feel that you need some extra accountability (now that you don’t have a manager peeking over your shoulder), e-mail this list to a motivational partner every morning. (Leslie A. Joy, a tweep of mine, has coined the oh-so-perfect term “accountabilibuddy.”)

3. Schedule in some time that has nothing to do with work.

When you work from home, it can be easy to forget things like lunch. Showers. Pants.

(The bralessness is a personal choice.)

So when you’re scheduling out those blocks of time for the day ahead, include blocks for that hoop dancing class you’ve had your eye on. A quick snuggle with your cats. Dance breaks with your cats. A daily walk. Topless yoga in the living room. Making time for these things will allow you to decompress and recharge, and will keep you from burning out. Because even when you love the work you’re doing, there can be too much of a good thing.

And don’t forget to make time for your friends and family! I know you love your work, but your peeps can at least love you back.

4. Get the hell out of dodge.

Where the magic happens.

Whether you’re looking to take your work with you, or you want to make some purely social plans, you need to get out. At least sometimes. Or you’ll go stir crazy. Or lose the capacity to interact with other human beings.

I make it a point to schedule at least one social activity a week. And I sometimes take my laptop to a coffee shop nearby. There’s an outlet in the corner. There’s free Wi-Fi. The coffee mugs are ridiculously large. I can be around other people. What’s not to love?

You could also seek out a co-working arrangement. According to the infographic mentioned at the beginning of this post, co-working spaces have grown from zero to 250 in the past five years.

5. Remember to punch out.

Too many freelancers and entrepreneurs work evenings.

They work through their nights. They work through their weekends.

Many will gladly admit to this, as if it was a badge of honor when, in fact, it’s just a bad habit.

When you don’t place boundaries on your time, both your health and your relationships can suffer, big time.

Not only that, but you could end up enabling some pretty pesky clients as well.

When you don’t respect your time, no one else will, either.

So don’t let your at-home career consume you. Eighty-nine percent of freelancers describe themselves as happier since they began freelancing full-time. Don’t become part of the other 11 percent.

Work from home? How do you retain the last threads of your sanity?

Related: Product Placement: Can You Afford Comfort?

Because 2009 was a rough one.

This time last year, it seemed that — no matter how desperately I looked — it was impossible to find paying work.

But then, at the end of 2009, shortly after I had started a new part-time job at YourTango, Ian Kerner contacted me about co-writing an ebook with him for his new Good In Bed web project. Several months later, I was contacted by someone at AOL’s Patch about copy editing. The other month, an editor at The Frisky asked me if I’d be interested in writing a regular sex column for them. And then, the other week, someone at Psych Central e-mailed me, asking if I would be interested in writing for their site, as one of their editors had seen my LoveMom piece on depression, and had been impressed.

I’m not trying to gloat (though sometimes I like to point at my husband and say neener-neener). I’m just sayin’… it’s totally possible to bring in new projects without lifting a finger. How?

Okay. This is a two-part process, so listen carefully. Basically? Work your ass off while simultaneously developing (and maintaining) relationships with others in your field.

What? You didn’t think it would be easy, did you?

Work Your Ass Off:

1. Continue brainstorming new ideas, researching markets, writing up query letters, sending out pitches… and then? Do it all over again. Be relentless.

2. Don’t allow yourself to get discouraged when business is slow. It just means that you have to hustle more. The more you hustle, the more you’ll be rewarded, even if the rewards are not immediate. And those pitches that were rejected, or those proposals that were turned down? It’s nothing personal. Rather, it’s bad timing. Or a not-quite-right fit. Or a too-small budget. Or any number of other things. Be relentless, and the work will start picking up again. Allow yourself to wallow, and the few opportunities that are actually out there will pass you by.

3. When things are slow, you can also stay afloat by getting creative. A year ago, I had to face the fact that blogging, pitching, and copy editing weren’t paying the bills. I asked myself how I could expand my business, using my skills and experience to offer up something completely new. As a result, I ended up on the other side of the publishing fence, editing other people’s work at YourTango. I also entered a career coaching certification program, and eventually launched a career coaching practice focused on the publishing industry. Now, if any one aspect of my career slows down, there are other things I can turn to. It opens me up to more opportunities, and the sense of security I receive from that is priceless.

If You Don’t Schmooze, You Lose:

As a result of all the work I continued to do after the New York Sun folded — in addition to all of the other ways in which I tried to connect with new people, and stay connected with former colleagues — my professional network has expanded exponentially in the past year, and things have slowly but steadily picked up. That gig at YourTango? It didn’t hurt that I had worked with one editor in the past, at another publication, and it also didn’t hurt that I had written two pieces for the site the year before (one of which had performed quite well, landing me appearances on both a radio show, and on CNN). How did Ian Kerner find me? I had interviewed him for an article in Time Out New York several months earlier, so I was on his mind as he began planning his latest web venture. Patch? They found me through LinkedIn, oddly enough. And my fairly new sex column? I was actually in contact with an editor at The Frisky because of a content partnership the site had with YourTango, and when this editor’s colleagues decided they should launch a sex column, she thought of me.

Every day, new and amazing opportunities pop up because of the people I’ve worked with in the past, or met both in person or online.

How can you build similar relationships?

1. Stay connected with former colleagues, editors, clients, sources, etc. Because, as the saying goes, one person may know someone who knows someone else who knows someone who’d like to hire you.

2. Develop new relationships by taking classes, attending industry events, and participating heavily in the social media sphere. And remember: the key in developing these new relationships is good karma. Don’t be transparently looking out for yourself, asking others what they can do for you. Rather, ask yourself what you can do for them. Connect them with people they might like to work with. Ask them to collaborate on a project. Share their amazing content or brilliant products. Interact and get to know them.

3. Be authentic. I hate being sales-y. I’d much rather just be… me. Luckily, it seems to work, both in my writing and in my business relationships. So instead of practicing your elevator speech, just engage. The connections you make this way will be much stronger, and much more real. And also much more mutually beneficial.

And then? Don’t worry! If you follow all of these tips, you’ll eventually pick up momentum. And at that point, the work will just start pouring in, all without you having to lift a finger.

Related: Nothing To Do With Luck, The Road To Freelance Success Is Paved With Good Karma

[Image via]

Oh my god, you guys. The other week, I asked for suggestions on what I should include in my Job Hopping for Word Nerds e-book. Heather of CraftLit provided me with a goldmine of great suggestions, some of which I deemed outside the scope of my book. Still, I thought they would make for some great blog post fodder. So today, I decided to address this one:

How can I use social media without being swallowed by it?

So I opened up my Freelancedom dashboard, typed in the title of this post, aaand… then proceeded to spend the next four hours on Twitter.

Oy.

So basically, this is a case of do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do:

1. Find your audience. And by audience, I’m referring to anyone from blog readers to clients to anyone else who might pay you money or somehow further your career…the people you’re looking to reach with your work or your blog (or both). And for every one of you — depending upon your niche — the place where your audience hangs out will be different. I use Twitter because you’re my audience, and you guys seem to spend an awful lot of time there. But you may find that your particular audience spends more time on LinkedIn, or Brazen Careerist, or Facebook, or a professional forum or listserv. Check out this monster list on some of the social networking sites out there.

2. Become active within that particular community. A lot of people make the mistake of signing up for every damn social network that comes along. Hussy. You don’t have to do that. You shouldn’t worry that the tide is passing you by. If you’ve done your research right, the only place you need to be is the place where your primary audience is already hanging out. So sign up for that one social network, or those two social networks, but don’t go too crazy beyond that. You want to be able to put together that best possible profile you can, and then participate as fully as you can. And you won’t have the time to do that if you’re maintaining accounts on 15 different sites. Once you have a dynamite profile in place, start participating. Concentrate on adding value and having meaningful conversations. The magic (whatever magic you’re looking for) will naturally happen.

3. Set goals. I’ve heard a lot of people poo-poo social networks because they “don’t see the point.” Well, there won’t be much of a point if you don’t know why you’re there. To attain focus and efficiency on your social network of choice, draw up a brief plan. That way, you won’t be wasting your time wandering the Internet aimlessly. For example, my goals with Twitter are to a) promote my brand and my work, b) find and share relevant content, and c) build up a network of fellow freelancers. My tweets (for the most part) reflect that.

4. Severely limit your time on these sites. I am obviously bad at this. At least when it comes to Twitter. But I have become way more efficient simply by keeping my Google Reader closed throughout the day, checking it once at lunch time and once more in the evening. I suggest scheduling out blocks of time in which you’re allowed to do the social media thing, and keeping those sites closed for the rest of the day. You know. In order to avoid temptation. If you have absolutely no discipline (::coughcough::), read this post again. It contains some additional tips, and also some suggestions for apps you can use to lock yourself out of specific websites. Pure genius.

5. Keep everything in one place. If you are juggling multiple sites, there are several apps that will enable you to juggle them a bit more gracefully. Because I have no interest in competing with what Mashable already does so well, I’ll point you to a couple of their posts about the best apps to use when it comes to aggregating all of your online profiles:

• 20 Ways to Aggregate Your Social Networking Profiles
• HOW TO: Manage Multiple Social Media Profiles

Finally, in parting, I’d like to beg you: Please don’t sign up for Foursquare! My husband just signed up for the damn thing, and my Twitter feed is now cluttered with tweets from him going back and forth in the Lincoln Tunnel. (Maybe I should just ask that you not sign up for Foursquare if your life is as uneventful as my husband’s.)

Related: Getting It All Done: Your Master To-Do List, Resource Roundup: 4 Time Management Applications, Going Unplugged: Impossible?

Lordy, it’s shaping up to be quite the month. Things at YourTango continue to get even busier (who knew that was possible?), and my ongoing copywriting project soldiers on. I’m also leading a team in Freelance Success‘s biannual Query Challenge, and I spent yesterday doing some market research at Barnes & Noble, and sending out query letters and LOIs. I’m loving my team. They’re so…motivated. It’s gonna be a trip to keep up with them!

But let’s hold off on February for the moment. How did I do last month?

1. Finish Phase 3 of this copywriting project with a minimum of angst.

The copywriting project goes on, and slower than I expected. Part of it is the tedium, though it’s a topic I typically enjoy (I’m feeling all sexed out, you guys). Part of it is the winter doldrums. And a huge part of it is the fact that I’m getting so into my part-time job — to the point of giddiness, really — that I’ve been allowing my responsibilities there to seep into my freelance hours. Still, the show must go on, and my client is thus far thrilled beyond belief with what I’ve turned in. In fact, he’s already suggested that we work together on future projects. Yay?

2. Make major headway with my new, professional web platform, and order me up some new business cards.

My husband has promised to squeeze this into his schedule of projects he actually gets money for. For the moment, he’s designed my header and set me up on WordPress. He also put together my business card design and, last week, I handed out my first one at a soiree thrown by a book publisher that does business with YourTango.

3. Revive YourTango’s Love Buzz Twitter account.

I’ve been spending a lot of time on this one. First, I tried out a bunch of different web-based services that allowed me to manage multiple Twitter accounts, finally settling upon HootSuite. Then, I spent an awful long time (stretched across several weeks) trying to mass unfollow the dead weight in the LB Twitter feed. I wanted to be able to engage with the people I was following, but there was so much spam in the feed, mostly because the account was initially set up to automatically follow everyone back (ugh). Now I’m concentrating on interesting tweets, RTs, and good conversation.

4. Revive Inside YourTango.

I’ve only done up one new post, but I’ve collected a lot of new content for the blog, which I will start publishing slowly.

5. Start my career coaching practicum.

Aaaahahahaha. I am tired.

6. Achieve balance.

I’m getting better. I’ve stopped checking certain social media sites during the work day, and have also severealy limited the YourTango work I bring home. I’m also saying yes to life a whole lot more, and have lately been more social than I’ve been in…years!

So what’s in store for February?

1. Put together an intake packet for my career coaching practice. I figure that this is one of the things that held me back from starting my practicum last month. I was afraid to start looking for clients, because I wasn’t fully ready to take them on.
2. Run a contest on this blog that will both drum up interest in my coaching practice, and land me some practicum clients (who are willing to fill out feedback forms, and then allow me to excerpt their feedback as testimonials on my new site).
3. Make major headway on that copywriting project (I’m afraid to wish for actual completion).
4. Send out at least five queries a week. I don’t want to let down my QC team!

Fingers crossed.