Wanted: A Writing Partner Who Can Kick My Writing Ass

Wanted: A writing partner who can kick my lazy, procrastinating writer’s ass. Must: Thrive on deadlines, and be willing to offer up honest and constructive criticism, while still being mindful of my multitudinous neuroses, my overwrought sensitivity, and my blind, codependent love affair with my own words. Should enjoy: Caffeine addiction, cats, serial commas, fuzzy pants, Slankets, and dance breaks. Must have a zero-tolerance policy for: Auto DMs, Foursquare, and checking one’s smartphone while in the company of others.

Interested? For the love of god, please e-mail me. Like, right now.

Last week, I started reading Adair Lara’s Naked, Drunk, and Writing. (Note: I fell madly in love with this book after only a single paragraph, and have since resisted the urge to dog-ear just about every single by-god page. A review is obviously forthcoming.)

Not only did it remind me of what I was missing in my writing life (I need to be doing a lot less listicles and a lot more personal essays), but it also made me remember how good it once felt to have a writer’s group.

And it made me realize that even a single writing partner may just be the thing I need right now to revitalize my writing. Because if there’s one thing I’m lacking these days, it’s accountability.

I’ve written about accountability in the past, and the various places you can go to find it.

But just to review, accountability is magic. And glitter. And kittens. And (double) rainbows. It’s the type of thing that can get you writing every day, meeting deadlines, achieving dreams, and taking over the world.

It can also lead to you earning enough money to buy pretty dresses.

All without selling your soul. (See: black magic.)

Without accountability, it can be reeeaally easy to just spend your days watching DVR’d episodes of Tabatha’s Salon Takeover, snacking on croutons (shut up; there was nothing else in the pantry), playing Zuma Blitz on Facebook, and ordering out-of-season Candy Cane Kisses on Amazon.

And accomplishing nothing.

If you have no trouble cranking out Pulitzer Prize-worthy sentences on a daily basis without anyone else’s help, kudos to you. I bow down before your greatness.

But if you’re struggling to get those words on the page… if you’re feeling stuck… if you’ve been procrastinating… consider a writing partner. In fact, consider me.


Where do you find accountability?

Related: 6 Ways To Find Your Next Mentor, Motivational Trick: Fear (of Letting Others Down), Build Your Own: Writing Group


  1. Mike Auteri says:

    I fail your zero tolerance policy for foursquare and using my smartphone in front of others.

  2. Colleen Meeks says:

    You’re my favorite. I always imagine a crime novel in which a stalker utilizes foursquare to hunt down his target. Way too much accountability for me. I don’t think I’m the right person to kick your ass (I’m trying to enforce a rigid writing schedule for my own self), but if I were ever productive enough to commit to a mutual ass-kicking relationship, I think you’d be the first person I’d drunk dial.

  3. You had me at “…kick my writing ass…”! Wanna give it a go? I’ve been known to kick a few assess in the therapy room here and there (everyday actually!). I want to write a book. Been using the blog as a platform for audience and material both. What are you writing?


  1. […] stressed the importance of writing partners and writing groups, making me realize that accountability, above all, was what I was […]

  2. […] accountability buddies, an idea inspired by the overwhelming response to my own, tongue-in-cheek writing partner personals ad. (Sign up for irregular site updates and event news […]

Speak Your Mind