Wanted: The Career Equivalent of an Open Marriage

three footsies

It always begins the same way:

I find my perfect match, give pursuit, and find that my positive attentions are — more often than not — eventually returned. I am giddy…fulfilled…content, and months pass with minimal complaint. I’m more than willing to overlook the small things. I even start to consider: Could this possibly be…The One?

But the honeymoon period inevitably ends. Small annoyances are now BIG DEALS. That, and I’m sort of bored. I crave variety…excitement…a good time with little commitment. I start to feel resentful.

I’m scared, though. My original match still makes me feel safe and secure and, well, I still need that. The reasons I had for loving my match haven’t changed, after all. But my dissatisfaction eventually becomes too big to ignore, and…

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Am I Brave, or Just in Need of a Mute Button?


Yesterday, CNN sent a camera crew to my house so that they could interview me for a segment on compulsive shopping. They had seen an old article of mine on Tango, and thought I would be the perfect interview subject. I experienced sweaty palms and extreme dry mouth as I attempted to sound coherent in front of the lights, camera, and crew. I worried that I was shouting in my attempt to be vivacious, but I couldn’t stop myself. I was oddly perky as I gave the guys a tour of my condo, pointing out frivolous purchases in a voice that didn’t exactly express my regret. I was an anxious mess. [Read more…]